The Queen’s Heartfelt Love for Prince Harry, but a Deep Disappointment
As the reign of Queen Elizabeth II came to its twilight, the monarch faced an unprecedented dilemma regarding her grandson, Prince Harry. The world watched as Harry and his wife, Meghan Markle, announced their decision to "step back" from their senior royal duties in early 2020, a move that would forever alter the dynamics within the royal family. While the Queen undeniably loved her grandson, especially for his lively and fun-loving character, her views as a monarch were far more critical.
According to royal author Robert Jobson, the Queen believed Harry had let her down. She saw him as a "maverick," someone who had deviated from the royal norms in a way that she could not condone. Her Majesty reportedly expressed that Harry's departure from royal duties was a "missed opportunity," as she knew that both Harry and Meghan had much to offer. However, the idea of the couple profiting off their royal titles, something that Harry and Meghan had started to do, was "abhorrent" to the Queen.
The Queen's stance on the matter was clear-cut: a royal role was all or nothing. She firmly believed that one could either fully serve the family or step away entirely—there was no middle ground. While she did not object to their desire for independence, she insisted that Harry and Meghan forfeit their patronages and stop using their HRH titles for personal or commercial gain.
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This decision led to one of the most famous royal meetings in history—the Sandringham Summit in January 2020. The Queen gathered her son, Prince Charles, her heir, and Prince William, along with Harry, to discuss the terms of the Sussexes' departure. Following the summit, the couple was told they could no longer use the "Sussex Royal" label and had to rebrand themselves.
Despite the Queen's personal affection for Harry, her duty to the monarchy required her to take a tough stance. She issued a statement expressing sadness at the decision, acknowledging the family's wish for a more independent life, but also affirming their removal from official duties. The Sussexes lost their military appointments, Harry's role as Commonwealth youth ambassador, and access to the Sovereign Grant. They were also required to repay the £2.4 million used to renovate their home, Frogmore Cottage.
Many royal observers, including author Tom Bower, felt that the Sussexes' initial plan to retain a "progressive role" within the royal family was disrespectful. It seemed to be an attempt to have their cake and eat it too, and the Queen made it clear that this would not be allowed. Harry, who had expected some resistance, was reportedly shocked by the royal family's uncompromising response.
Their final royal duty in March 2020, attending the UK Commonwealth Service, marked the end of their active roles. Upon arrival, they found they had been excluded from the royal lineup, a public snub that caused Harry immense pain. He later described feeling as though he had been "banished" from the royal family.
Though the Queen loved Harry, she could not reconcile his decision with her sense of duty. Her heartbreak was evident, and royal insiders claimed that the Queen never fully understood why Harry chose to turn his back on his responsibilities. For Her Majesty, abandoning duty was something alien to her, and she was deeply hurt by the family's estrangement.
Despite the distance, in the final years of her life, the Queen's love for Harry remained steadfast. But it was clear that, as a monarch, she could not tolerate the notion of "half-in, half-out" royals.
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