
Gary Kemp Reflects on Grief, Therapy, and His Spandau Ballet Legacy
Gary Kemp, best known as the driving force behind the iconic band Spandau Ballet, has recently opened up about the emotional breakthroughs that came through therapy and how he's come to terms with his past. The 65-year-old musician has had his fair share of highs and lows over the years, from the peak of Spandau Ballet’s success to personal struggles, and even navigating grief that he never fully acknowledged until much later.
During the first lockdown, Kemp found himself struggling with anxiety, something he attributes to the overwhelming state of the world and the burden of aging. It was his wife, Lauren, who suggested therapy to help him cope. What began as a simple Zoom session soon turned into a pivotal moment. Kemp, feeling a sense of unease, broke down in tears when the therapist asked about his family. He realized, in that instant, that he had never truly grieved the loss of his parents, who tragically passed away within days of each other back in 2009. At that time, he was also adjusting to the birth of his son, Kit, and reuniting with Spandau Ballet. The weight of all those life events at once had been too much for him to process, and it wasn’t until this breakthrough moment that he could truly face the grief.
The emotional release wasn’t just about processing loss, though. It prompted him to reflect on his parents’ sacrifices and the working-class values they instilled in him. Kemp, who grew up in Islington, London, in a home that shared an outside toilet with relatives and had no electricity until he was a toddler, now appreciates the work ethic they imparted, which has shaped his own drive throughout his career. The struggles his parents faced stayed with him, and he wanted to honor their memory with his music.
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Kemp’s new solo album, This Destination , is deeply personal. Unlike his time in Spandau Ballet, where much of his songwriting was directed toward creating hits for their frontman, Tony Hadley, this album allows Kemp to express his own feelings. Songs like “Work” serve as tributes to his parents, with Kemp now reflecting on how he might have missed some of their pain. His father, whom he admired as a superhero, was secretly battling a nervous breakdown caused by financial strain and job pressure. This realization has made Kemp reconsider his role as a father and what kind of example he sets for his own children.
But the journey hasn’t just been about looking back. Through his time in therapy and confronting his past, Kemp has come to terms with his place in the world and his legacy with Spandau Ballet. Despite some very public and personal disagreements, particularly with Hadley, Kemp has no regrets about his past. "I don’t recognize Tony’s view of me as the villain. We were opposites, and we didn’t always get along, but we had a legacy together,” he says, acknowledging that the band’s chart-topping success and their contributions to the New Romantic movement will always be a part of him.
There’s a sense of resolution in Kemp’s current outlook. He has learned to embrace life with fewer regrets, which includes repairing relationships that once seemed irreparable. “Even me and my ex-wife made up,” he shares, a sign that time and growth have allowed him to let go of old conflicts.
Gary Kemp’s journey from Spandau Ballet to self-reflection, therapy, and his new album shows a man coming to terms with the passage of time and the emotional weight that comes with it. “I think the older you get, the more you don’t want enemies,” he concludes, acknowledging that life is too short for lingering resentments. As he continues to navigate his own legacy and personal growth, Kemp is proving that it’s never too late to make peace with the past.
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